The more things change, the more things stay the same...

So, I have neglected to post for several months, and am sorry about that. I will try to update and in doing so, relieve some of the mind music that sounds like heavy metal ringing in my ears. I would really like to have my brain return to the smooth, soft, harmony that usually is playing in my mind.

Weather: we currently have about eight inches of snow. We are out of school AGAIN and I am concerned about when this school year will end. I love my j0b, but with my "seasonal disorder" I would enjoy a nice summer vacation.

Family: Jeff and I are still wonderful. Comanche has received his driver's license and moved on to another girlfriend. Lauren turned 19 yesterday, and our house is on the market. We want to move out to the Estes' farm. We want to enjoy the benefits of living in the country again, so Comanche can have some of the experiences that both Jeff and I did growing up.

Work: Wow. So far, this year has been flying by and I think we have tried to keep most of the drama that comes with middle school at bay. We still get the occasional flare up, but for the most part - we have great kids. They still want to please, so they try hard to meet our expectations for them. Teaching college has been such a blessing. I have really enjoyed meeting the people, and working with them to help them meet their own goals. I like that about what I do.

Extended family: All seems well, except for a few hurdles that my brothers are going through. I would like to see some of the drama end there, but when you live in a world full of sin, it is pretty probably that bad things are going to happen. I just hate when one of them has found himself in a situation that he simply did not ask for, nor did he even see coming. I would explain how infuriated I was, but I don't want the explicit language to come across the wrong way. Don't get me wrong - I am still pretty livid, but there are better ways to handle things than to stoop to the level of the one that deserves it. Hopefully, that person will understand how their actions have impacted an entire family. I read a book once about how when we are on earth and the pain we cause (whether intentional or not) will be shown to us when we get to Heaven. This guy that wrote the book died on an operating table and was given this box to open after he died. He opened the box and felt immense pain and suffering and explained it something like this: When he came home from work and took out his bad day on his wife, she in turn took it out on the kids, the kids then took it out on their friends, and their friends took it out on their own families. Well, the guy at the beginning not only felt his own pain again, but the pain of everyone after him because he had the choice to stop it with himself. Anyway - I can't imagine how painful that must have been for him. He was revived on the operating table and felt the need to write that book. I can't remember the title, but I think it was "Life After Life". In case you want to read it for yourself.

So - back to my original statement - I am not in a position to take on the world's ugliness, even though I often think I can, but I know someone who certainly has the power to do that. God knows how many people I have hurt in the past and I would really rather not have to add to the pain in the box that I will already get. Otherwise, I would be ALL over it. I guess the people who impact others will just have to learn the hard way.

As for the rest of my family - they all seem to be doing well. I was able to add a sister to my life just recently. She lives in California and is attending college there. I got her number from my mom and step-dad, so I called her up and introduced myself. It was great talking to her and getting to know her. Up until then, I had only seen a couple of pictures of her, but did not know how to get into touch with her.

Alright - I think my mind music is calming down for now. At least now I can make some sense of the rhythm again. I didn't realize how much I missed this until Sandy made me aware that I hadn't posted in a while. Thanks, friend, for sensing that I needed this outlet. You always did know how to calm my spirit. :)